The pressures of society, work, and home have created many unhappy individuals. We all start out wanting to advance our career for the right reasons. We want to enable a better quality of life for ourselves and for the people we care about. Yet so many of us one day realize that we have become workaholics, that we have lost sight of our purpose, that we struggle to stay connected to the people we care about.
Apart from feeling unhappy, when we loose our inner balance and our sense of fulfillment; we feel more stress, anxiety, sadness, isolation and loneliness. All of these affect our motivation, impact our productivity, and often leave us feeling trapped and powerless. The heightened state it creates in us often negatively influences how we interact with the people who love us.
Getting back to what matters
We often resort to giving ourselves unreasonable choices in how we choose to live our life. We convince ourselves that we have to always choose between options like success and fulfillment.
Back before I started my coaching practice, early in my career, I was a success chaser. I was in software with a great title, loads of responsibility leading teams, a nice six figure salary and lucrative bonus plan. By all external accounts I was successful. I was driven because 1.) quite frankly I was good at what i did and 2.) I wanted my family to have a nice comfortable life. I was giving my company 100% of all that I had to maintain this life and status. My family wound up getting what scraps were left of me at the end of the day. I was focused on succeeding, so I could give them physical things, when what they really wanted was just me.
If you were to ask my wife, she would tell you I was miserable to be around. Inside I was angry all the time. I was angry at work, I was angry at home, I was angry at myself. At that time I did not understand that it was OK to have both, that I could be successful and also have fulfilling personal life. It was only when a trusted mentor intervened in my life and started changed my thinking did I start to understand what I was doing to myself and my family.
I did not know it then, but how learning to deal with my own work life balance issues and then learning as a leader to help my employee’s find balance was a key starting point in my journey to becoming a coach. I only wish that I knew a bit more then what I have learned now, it would have saved some relapse and trial and error.
Healing really starts with a pause and evaluation of how your current priorities and core values need to align to work together. We too often misalign our efforts in one area as an attempt to satisfy a need in another area. For example take connection, the human need to be connected to a community of people who we love and love us. Being active on a social media platform has us “connected”, but not in connection deeply.
We work with clients on work life balance issues we often have to restore balance across multiple areas of life and work to re-build and re-enforce the skills needed to make the change lasting. In the end clients not only more satisfaction in life an relationships but often a much healthier revived sense of productivity.
While each client has different circumstance the general approach starts with:
- Clarity Session – Coach and Client understanding the health of different key life areas
- Honest review of direct and indirect relationships
- Identifying direct and indirect resources available
- Based on what we learn we plan the new vision we want to achieve
- We identify any limitations (internal and external) we need to resolve to move forward
- The client starts taking steps in the new direction
- We resource and remove blockers that come up along the way
- We frequently and honestly reflect on progress, we want this to have a very healthy outcome!
All of this starts with deciding you want to have something different then you have today. Please use this contact page linked below to request a free consultation. Just indicate in the questions sections that you want an Work Life Balance consult.